


The Handy-Not-Man

by SianRuns, TheRainbowRollercoaster



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-15
Updated: 2016-08-15
Packaged: 2018-08-08 23:58:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7778692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SianRuns/pseuds/SianRuns, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRainbowRollercoaster/pseuds/TheRainbowRollercoaster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Delphine's pipes are leaking.<br/>Someone needs to clean up the mess...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Handy-Not-Man

**Author's Note:**

> TheRainbowRollercoaster teamed up with SianRuns to write some smut!  
> This is, without a doubt, the most exciting three-way to have occurred on this planet.  
> We hope you enjoy it.

***Your handyman will arrive between the hours of 10am and 4pm. This is an automated message. Do not reply.***

Delphine sighed and tossed the phone aggressively against the kitchen worktop. The entire day was wasted. All the blonde wanted was a scalding cup of tea to accompany her breakfast, but she knew full well that the handyman would appear on the doorstep at the last possible given moment.

She took a moment to glance at the petite watch gracing her slender wrist. It was 9:57, if she left now she might just make it to the corner shop and back before 10:00. Delphine quickly decided that it would be well worth the risk for the sake of not upsetting her usual Saturday routine.

It was now or never, she supposed. She shot up, glided into the hallway, grabbed her coat, and slipped it on. Delphine grabbed her keys from the hook on her door, opened it and hurried out. She turned to lock the door behind her, and upon retracting the key, she spun behind her to head off and be back in time.

Her plans were held up when she felt something smack into her front, something with quite some force behind it, knocking the breath out of her. She coughed as she regained her balance and pulled air back into her lungs, finally looking up to see what had just pressed into her chest with such vigour.

To her surprise, it was a small woman with dreadlocked brunette hair and quite adorable little glasses. She was red faced and clearly embarrassed at having bumped into Delphine in such an awkward manner. She looked at Delphine sheepishly, swinging her toolbox gently at her side.

“Handyman for Hire…” she mumbled, “Sorry, I think I’m early… Surprise…” Delphine sighed internally. Breakfast didn’t need tea. She could have yoghurt instead. It wasn’t the same thing, but it would be fine…

“Non, do not worry, I suppose the earlier you are here the earlier it gets done, oui?” The smaller, brunette woman gulped and nodded. Delphine led her inside. She was about to offer her a cup of tea but realised that she had no milk, the one thing she had just left to get, that had caused such an uncomfortable first meeting.

“Ehm… I am afraid I have no milk, but if you would like some tea anyway…” she started, trailing off, not sure where to take the invitation of tea to a woman who had already become so intimately acquainted with her breasts.

“Um, no, that’s fine, thanks. I have some water bottles packed up in my van… I should be fine, thanks.”

“Okay, excellent,” Delphine nodded, “have you had anything to eat yet?”

“I’m fine, ma’am, really, but thank you for asking,” the woman smiled nervously. “Really, I just need you to help me through the details of what you needed to be done here today. The info I got was a leaky pipe and broken cupboard hinges. Was that right, ma’am?”

Delphine nodded, and quickly slipped her coat off, putting it down so that she could lead the woman into her kitchen. She pointed to the sink.

“That’s where the pipe is leaking, under the sink, and the cupboard doors here… and here… are jamming. I think the hinges need replacing, but that’s it.” The brunette woman nodded, and then looked at Delphine again.

“That’s all good – but, I gotta say… I’m totally sorry about what happened out there just now, I didn’t think you’d move so quickly and I just sorta… and then-”

“Please, do not mention it,” Delphine cut her off, and then bit her lip. That was rude of her… “I am sorry, too. I should have been paying attention.” She held out her hand to the woman in front of her, “My name is Delphine.” The brunette took a second to catch onto what she intended but then realised she still had her toolbox in her hand, and a mysterious plastic bag in another.

She quickly bent to the side to place them against the wall, and Delphine took that time to appreciate the curve of her figure. When she rose again, she took Delphine’s hand and shook it.

“My name’s Cosima,” she responded, grinning.

“Enchantée,” Delphine smirked.

“Enchantée.”

Delphine was pleasantly surprised by the smoothness of the brunette's hands. She would have expected rough digits wrapping around her own, Cosima was a handyman after all. Instead, it was as if soft velvet was caressing her fingers.

"I, ummm ... I should probably check what's wrong with your piping." Using her free hand, she pointed her thumb over her shoulder, where the sink was.

"Oui, that is a good idea!" Nodding her head enthusiastically, Delphine noticed too late that she was still holding the brunette's hand in hers. She dropped it and was thankful that Cosima was quick to turn around so that she didn't see the blush creeping across her face.

"Alright, let's see what we have here ... " Opening the doors of the cupboard underneath the sink, she knelt down. Sticking her head into the cupboard, she was apparently trying to see where the problem lay. "Okay, it's way too dark." Moving her head back and forth and repositioning her hands, every little motion shook her whole body. Especially her well-rounded backside that Delphine was shamelessly staring at, at that point.

At some point Cosima had removed her head from the cupboard and the sound of the brunette clearing her throat brought the blonde from her daydream. She couldn't stop the heated blush that spread across her cheeks.

She mentally scolded herself and tried to shake off the impending arousal that was beginning to form between her legs. Not appropriate, she chastised. The handy-not-man was staring at her curiously now, hand on hip and lips curved in a delightfully impish smirk. Cosima cleared her throat again.

"Er, desolé, what did you say?" Delphine stuttered.

"Could you show me where exactly the problem is?" She asked, voice thick with humour. Delphine quickly sank to her knees in front of the sink before she blushed for a third time that morning, and tried to point out the area in which the leak was situated.

"Cosima, do you have a torch? S'il te plaît." Delphine waited for what felt like an eternity bent awkwardly at the waist, well aware of the fact that her rear was sticking right in the brunette’s face before she sensed the girl moving around behind her. What she wasn't expecting was the delicious pressure of the handyman pressing herself against Delphine's ass, hands gently rested on her hip bones. "Sorry, just had to grab that torch."

Oh no, this handyman certainly was not a man, as the soft caresses of her hands on Delphine’s hips betrayed, her gentle fingers sliding ever so slowly up the Frenchwoman’s shirt. Delphine froze, her ass prone to the woman behind her, but she did not stop the brunette, enjoying the shivers her hands sent through her body.

“And this is the torch that you chose to grab?” she asked breathily, closing her eyes tight as Cosima pushed against her harder.

“Well,” the smaller woman’s voice came from behind her, “this torch has an excellent handle,” she murmured lowly, as she gripped onto Delphine’s waist and Delphine shoved her ass against the woman behind her.

“You’ve done an excellent job…” she started, shivering as Cosima groaned at a sensation that clearly pleased her, “an excellent job… at turning this torch on…”

“Well, excuse me for being so forward, ma’am, but I certainly would like to put this torch somewhere the sun don’t shine… light it up... if you will…” Cosima sighed, now clutching onto Delphine tightly, rubbing against her with a vigour that surprised the blonde.

“If I am but a torch to you, then surely you must do with me as you wish,” Delphine cried out when Cosima’s hands brushed over her breasts, “and stick my end wherever you want it!” she moaned, and Cosima shivered in response.

Will do, ma'am." When Delphine felt the brunette's hands leave her breasts, she was disappointed for a second. Until her shirt was pushed up, bunched at her shoulders, and she felt hot lips trailing her spine. When she felt Cosima's pelvis rhythmically grinding into her, she couldn't hold in a moan.

Next thing she knew, she could feel a wet tongue against her back and her whole body jerked in reaction. "Cosima!" She could feel the vibrations in the brunette when a chuckle rolled off her lips.

"Never seen a torch this desperate to be used ... " Still, her hands were quick to open the blonde’s bra and then quickly going back to her breasts, which were now swaying more freely. Rolling Delphine's nipples between her fingers, she didn't cease her movement against the blonde. The weight of her breasts in her hand and the way the blonde's ass pressed against her deliciously, she could practically feel the wetness pooling between her legs. Just as she was about to take initiative and do something against the barriers of clothing between them, Delphine put her hands on the counter and pulled herself up, now sitting on her knees.

Dark eyes looking over her shoulder, she was quick to pull her shirt over her head and to remove her bra. Only when her hands popped the button of her jeans, did Cosima manage to pull her eyes from the blonde and started removing her own clothing as well. When she opened her eyes again after pulling off her shirt, the blonde was still in the same position but had somehow taken off her pants and panties, now completely nude in front of the brunette.

Getting rid of her bra, she went to work, removing the rest of her clothing as well, although not half as graceful or quick as the blonde had been. When she was finally free, she noticed Delphine's hungry look directed right at the bare skin at the apex of her thighs.

"Bedroom?" But all the blonde did was bite her bottom lip and shake her head.

"No," she started and grabbed the brunette's hands, putting them on her hips. "Right here."

Cosima pushed the blonde forward firmly so that she fell onto her hands and knees on the wood vinyl kitchen floor. She peppered her spine with wet kisses again and sat back on her ankles to admire the view, feeling smug at the turn of events.

Such a beautiful woman ready and panting beneath her touch. Unable to resist, Cosima slapped firmly once at the soft skin of Delphine’s rear, causing her to yelp in surprise. When Delphine felt the woman’s bare wet heat collide hotly with her ass cheek, her breath hitched and she attempted to bite back the moan.

“Mmm, no. I want to hear you. Don’t hold back.” Cosima breathed heavily in her ear, now starting up a gentle rhythm of rocking hips against the supple skin. With every bump providing such a delicious pressure on her clit, Cosima’s grip around the taller woman’s waist grew tighter, short nails digging into her flesh, as her groans built in decibels.

Delphine could feel the arousal growing thick between her own thighs, revelling in the feeling of the brunette’s slick heat colliding and rolling impossibly faster. With the horny woman grinding so frantically against her, she craved a release in pressure herself and found herself pleading with the handywoman.

“Cosima, touche-moi, s’il te plaît.” She cried out. Cosima let out her a guttural moan at the French words tumbling from Delphine’s lips, but she forced herself to put some distance between them before she came shamefully and embarrassingly quickly against the blonde’s perfect ass.

 

She knelt behind the blonde woman, breathing heavily and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. Delphine turned around at the loss of contact, and when she saw Cosima, eyes dark and heavy-lidded, she felt her whole body swoop, aroused beyond belief.

She was sitting on her ass now, and her legs were open wide to the woman in front of her as she leant back with her palms on the floor. “Cosima, please, please touch me,” she repeated, and Cosima groaned again. She pounced on Delphine, their lips crashing together and moulding to fit the other as they opened to allow their tongues to meet.

Delphine pushed herself up and then brought her arms around behind Cosima, pulling her goose-bumped body closer to her own so that their chests were pressing together as they kissed. Cosima moved so that Delphine’s right leg slotted between her own, and she spread her arousal all down Delphine’s leg as she searched for the friction that threatened to make her come so very quickly. Delphine, needing such a feeling for herself, grabbed Cosima’s right thigh and pulled it between her own legs, desperately trying to find an angle that would reward her, too.

“Cosima!" Whenever the brunette's mouth wasn't pressed to her own, moans and gasps escaped the blonde and when Cosima made her way along her cheek to her ear and started nibbling on her earlobe, it took all she had to keep herself from crying out loudly.

Grinding down, she could feel the brunette's hands on her back, holding her tight and wandering down her spine. When she reached her buttocks, she gave them a tight squeeze. Now reorienting and trailing her wet tongue down Delphine's neck, Cosima latched onto the blonde's pulse point. Bringing her teeth to the soft flesh underneath, she was rewarded with a jerk that she could feel right against her pulsing heat.

The feeling of teeth against her neck made Delphine squirm and with all this stimulation, Cosima's soft breasts rubbing against her own, her leg slick against the blonde's clit and her hands on her ass, she thought she couldn't possibly get more aroused, more desperate.

Until she felt Cosima's hand wander down further, her fingers making a trail in between her buttocks. "Quoi?" Is what she wanted to say, instead, she let out a guttural moan as the brunette slipped the tip of her pinky into her ass.

"Ohhh!" It was just too much, all too much. She needed release and the brunette sensed her state instantly. Beginning to fuck her ass slowly, she did her best to provide the taller woman with as much friction as possible, putting even more force behind her thigh that she was grinding against.

"Plus, plus..." Delphine gasped, feeling the coiled spring in her core winding tighter and tighter. Cosima was quick to oblige and swiftly replaced the pressure from her thigh and sunk two fingers into the blonde's scalding heat, not afraid to let out a primal growl when she felt just how wet the woman was between her fingers.

It wasn't much longer before Delphine's entire being began to shake with the force of her pleasure. Cosima's fingers pumped relentlessly into her heat, the heel of her hand colliding just right with her clit and the pinky on her other hand wriggled soft and shallow inside between her cheeks.

"Merde, Cosima, oh!" The taller woman yelled in a continuous moan as she crashed hard over the edge, her body clenching impossibly tight around Cosima's fingers. She collapsed heavily on top of the brunette, hips still canting slowly, riding out the aftershocks of the orgasm.

"Holy watershed!" Gasped the handyman as she felt and watched the mixture of wetness and come trickle down her hand and across her wrist. "This is so, so hot..." The brunette whispered under her breath, though she was certain Delphine wouldn't have been able to hear over the sound of her heaving breaths.

She placed a chaste kiss on Delphine's swollen lips and slowly removed her fingers from her core. The blonde's eyes shot open, pupils dark with desire. She took one look at the brunette splayed out opposite her and husked, "Your turn."

“Oh Ma’am, please!” she groaned, the heat between her legs growing unbearable. The Frenchwoman smirked at her, and then dived between Cosima’s legs headfirst. She didn’t tease; it would only have prolonged agony for the handyman.

Instead, she extended out her tongue and dipped it into Cosima’s pooling heat, tasting arousal that was dripping down onto her chin and being rubbed all over Delphine’s lips due to Cosima’s bucking hips as she felt the sensation of Delphine’s muscle push deep inside her, making large, overzealous circles that had the brunette gasping for air.

It was as if Delphine had sucked all of the breath out of her, and stolen her ability to breathe at the same time. Cosima opened and closed her mouth for a few moments, making no sound, until Delphine dragged her tongue up to meet Cosima’s clit and filled her cunt with two fingers. Cosima began to shake on the floor when she felt her clit being stroked by such a skilled tongue, her vocal chords still refusing to function along with her excited muscles.

Only when Delphine’s mouth closed around the nub did Cosima find her voice. She let out an almighty wail, and brought a hand around to the back of Delphine’s head in an attempt to bring her tongue closer, make Delphine's mouth clutch her clit tighter, make her tongue flick against it faster, faster, faster!

The blonde knew exactly what she was doing. The way her tongue vibrated against Cosima's bundle of nerves made the brunette shut her eyes tightly and arch her back off the kitchen floor tiles.

"Oh fuck," her voice was breaking now at the sensation, she could barely think, let alone speak. "Don't stop!" The blonde had no intention to stop, quite to the contrary. After her next thrust into her pulsing heat, she added a third finger. An action rewarded with a guttural groan from the petite woman underneath her and blunt fingernails clawing at her skull.

Delphine could feel that she was close, oh so close. The way the brunette's tight walls worked around her fingers, the way her thighs clenched around her head, locking it in place, she knew that it wouldn't take much longer. Doubling her efforts, she made sure to reach deep inside the handyman, to curl her fingers in just the right way, to hit her front wall in just the right way.

When she then closed her lips around her clit and started sucking on it gently, she could hear Cosima taking in a breath and holding it. Her abs tight, every single muscle in her body seemed to be flexing. Her walls pulsating around the blonde's fingers, milking them, she let out her breath in an inhuman moan, pulling on the blonde's hair, scratching her skull. Cosima felt like she was exploding. Every single nerve ending in her body tingled as she came, waves of energy emanating from her core.

"OH FUCK!" She could feel her thighs clench, her fingers flex. Somewhere in the back of her head, she was worried about hurting the blonde. But that thought was far away now, she just needed more. And more is what she got, the blonde not stopping her motions until the last wave had subsided and all that was left of the handyman was a puddle on her kitchen floor.

Delphine placed gentle kisses all the way up the brunette’s form and settled down on the cool floor so that their bodies were level. Cosima’s breath was still coming in hard pants and Delphine was enamoured by the swell of her breasts rising and falling in time. A sheen of sweat glistened on her skin and Delphine found herself nuzzling into the handyman’s warm neck, throwing an arm across her waist.

Cosima stirred in her arms, breath now fully evened out. She propped herself up on her right elbow and gazed down at Delphine. “Hmm, I think I’m going to enjoy working for you.” She placed a kiss on top of the blonde’s nose. “What a shame that your sink is going to need a special part ordering in, and who better to fit it than me?” The brunette said playfully.

“In that case, we’d better get comfortable whilst we wait.”


End file.
